Pyrion Flax Announcer Pack

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Pyrion Flax Announcer Pack
Cosmetic icon Announcer Pyrion Flax.png
Bundle
Rarity: Mythical
Slot: Announcer Pack

This pack replaces the Default announcer and Mega-Kills announcer with the unique and unruly humor of Dota 2 satirist Pyrion Flax.
Created By
Released
Origin
Pyrion Flax Announcer Pack
Announcer: Pyrion Flax
Mega-Kills: Pyrion Flax

Contents

Welcome

50% chance, only for All Pick, Least Played, Limited Heroes and Mid Only

5% chance, only for the same modes as above

1% chance, only for the same modes as above

Game mode

All Pick

  • Play r All pick, thank God.
  • Play r All pick.

All Random

  • Play r All random? What the bloody hell is going on?
  • Play r All random? Why would you do such a thing?
  • Play r All random.

Captain's Draft

  • Play r Captain's draft? Yawn.
  • Play r Captain's draft.

Captain's Mode

  • Play r Tryhard meganerd mode.
  • Play r Captain's mode.

Deathmatch

  • Play r Deathmatch? Tell me this isn't literally a deathmatch.
  • Play r Deathmatch!

Easy Mode

  • Play u Easy mode! My favorite mode!

Least Played

  • Play r Least played!
  • Play r Least played mode.
  • Play r Least played mode.

Mid Only

Random Draft

  • Play r Random draft? Why didn't anyone tell me? Oh god.
  • Play r Random draft.

Reverse Captain's Mode

  • Play r Reverse captain's mode.
  • Play r Activate reverse captain's mode.
  • Play r Sniatpac mode!

Single Draft

  • Play r Single draft? In this modern age how is such cruelty permitted to exist?
  • Play r Single draft.

Other Modes
Limited Heroes, One vs One and other possible future game modes

  • Play r Pick your hero!

Drafting

Picking

  • Play Your turn to pick.
  • Play Enemy team's turn to pick!
  • Play Radiant team pick.
  • Play Dire team pick!

Banning

  • Play Ban a thing!
  • Play Your turn to ban.
  • Play Ban someone please!
  • Play Soon they will ban.
  • Play They're gonna ban someone.
  • Play Enemy's turn to ban.
  • Play Your opponents are banning.
  • Play Radiant team ban.
  • Play The green team's banning someone now.
  • Play Dire team ban.
  • Play Bad dudes banning someone now.

1% chance

  • Play Ban a dude. Ban Dark Seer, he's terrifying!

Time left to pick

  • Play u 10 Seconds idiot.
  • Play 5 seconds remaining.
  • Play Reserve time.
  • Play u You are using reserve time.
  • Play u Extra time.
  • Play u You are using extra time.

3% chance

  • Play Reserve time. It's not free, you know.

Draft end

  • Play u Our team is complete.
  • Play u Your team is complete.
  • Play u Radiant's team is complete.
  • Play u Dire's team is complete.
  • Play Well done, whoever did that. Let's just play Dota 2 now, geez. followup
  • Play Pick your hero!
  • Play You may now select your hero.

Picking specific heroes

30% chance

  • Play Ancient Apparition minimap icon.png r Man, once people start calling you ancient, you know it's over.
  • Play Ancient Apparition minimap icon.png r So Ancient Apparition is an apparition of an ancient apparition?
  • Play Alchemist minimap icon.png r Two men enter, one man leaves.
  • Play Anti-Mage minimap icon.png r Anti-fun!
  • Play Anti-Mage minimap icon.png r Hands up if you hate Anti-Mage!
  • Play Axe minimap icon.png r He hits you so hard you turn into a number!
  • Play Bane minimap icon.png r This dude is bloody terrifying.
  • Play Batrider minimap icon.png r Heh he he he fire! He he he!
  • Play Beastmaster minimap icon.png r He's master of beasts and who does he get to help him? A bird and a pig. Whop-e-do!
  • Play Bloodseeker minimap icon.png r Can he even see with that thing on?
  • Play Brewmaster minimap icon.png r I hope he's got some cider on him.
  • Play Brewmaster minimap icon.png r I reckon, and I'm going out on a limb here, but I reckon that this lad likes a drink.
  • Play Broodmother minimap icon.png r Ahh! Bloody hell! Get a massive newspaper!
  • Play Invoker minimap icon.png r Buttons buttons buttons!
  • Play Centaur Warrunner minimap icon.png r The charge of the extremely heavy brigade.
  • Play Centaur Warrunner minimap icon.png r Part man, part centaur.
  • Play Dark Seer minimap icon.png r Long lost cousin of the coneheads.
  • Play Dark Seer minimap icon.png r He's like a really bloody unpleasant hedgehog.
  • Play Dark Seer minimap icon.png r Ahh! It's Dark Seer! Ahh!
  • Play Disruptor minimap icon.png r Disruptor? I hardly knew her!
  • Play Disruptor minimap icon.png r He's got a lizard, a huge beard, and he can harness electricity! He's the man!
  • Play Doom minimap icon.png r Doommmmmm!
  • Play Doom minimap icon.png r Doom!
  • Play Doom minimap icon.png r Doom!
  • Play Doom minimap icon.png r Hail Doombringer.
  • Play Dragon Knight minimap icon.png r He's a dragon, a knight, and in his spare time he likes to bake.
  • Play Drow Ranger minimap icon.png r The words Drow and Ranger together is like a nerd magnet.
  • Play Earthshaker minimap icon.png r He's a big old lovable sloth bear thing.
  • Play Enigma minimap icon.png r He's a riddle, wrapped in a mystery, boxed up and shoved in a crate and stored in a giant warehouse.
  • Play Gyrocopter minimap icon.png r It's gyro, not geero. He's not a flying bloody kebab.
  • Play Gyrocopter minimap icon.png r One of the few truly mustachioed heroes in the game.
  • Play Huskar minimap icon.png r Huskar used to be called Buskar, but people don't give you spare change when you stab them in the neck with a flaming spear.
  • Play Jakiro minimap icon.png r This dragon has two heads?
  • Play Jakiro minimap icon.png r He's the bogof of the dragon world!
  • Play Jakiro minimap icon.png r Buy one dragon, get another dragon glued on the side!
  • Play Jakiro minimap icon.png r Buy one dragon, get another dragon melded on to the side! There's two dragons hrrr!
  • Play Juggernaut minimap icon.png r Go on juggles!
  • Play Juggernaut minimap icon.png r Behind that mask is a dude who is insanely dizzy!
  • Play Keeper of the Light minimap icon.png r The trick with Kotl is you annoy the hell out of everybody!
  • Play Leshrac minimap icon.png r A bloody great blue pony thing.
  • Play Lich minimap icon.png r Hell yeah, it's Lich!
  • Play Lifestealer minimap icon.png r You can't break those cuffs!
  • Play Lifestealer minimap icon.png r I can break these cuffs!
  • Play Lifestealer minimap icon.png r He looks like somebody reanimated a pizza.
  • Play Lina minimap icon.png r Oh ho ho! Oh Lina. Oh ho!
  • Play Lina minimap icon.png r She can light my fire. Because uh, she's a woman and she's got the fire and everything.
  • Play Lion minimap icon.png r Give 'em the finger!
  • Play Lion minimap icon.png r Here on the plains of the Serengeti we see the ugliest magician in the universe.
  • Play Lion minimap icon.png r What happens if he tries to hex an actual frog?
  • Play Lone Druid minimap icon.png r How can he be called Lone Druid when he has a bear for company?
  • Play Lycan minimap icon.png r Beware the moon!
  • Play Lycan minimap icon.png r Good doggie! Nice little pooch!
  • Play Meepo minimap icon.png r More Meepos, more problems.
  • Play Meepo minimap icon.png r Worst forty-five minutes of my life was playing as Meepo.
  • Play Morphling minimap icon.png r He's composed of H2O molecules that bonded with molecules of pure, grade-A bullpoop to form this monstrosity.
  • Play Morphling minimap icon.png r County's biggest, dampest, most unpleasant bumhead.
  • Play Naga Siren minimap icon.png r Naga siren. Sound the BS alarm. Aauuuuooonnn.
  • Play Nature's Prophet minimap icon.png r More like Nature's Profit! Am I right? Prophet. Proph-prophet yeah it works better on paper.
  • Play Necrophos minimap icon.png u Necrolyte! The diet version of Necro.
  • Play Night Stalker minimap icon.png r He works nights. Give the man a break.
  • Play Night Stalker minimap icon.png r It's night dude!
  • Play Nyx Assassin minimap icon.png r This guy is trying way too hard to be Sand King.
  • Play Phantom Lancer minimap icon.png r Oh my God. I have literally no idea what to do against this guy.
  • Play Phantom Lancer minimap icon.png r He looks like a really angry cat, but he has nothing to complain about.
  • Play Phantom Lancer minimap icon.png r A phantom lancer is worse than a phantom fart, let me tell ya.
  • Play Pudge minimap icon.png r He's a cockney. No I don't care what you think. Pudge is a cockney.
  • Play Bristleback minimap icon.png r Cor blimey gov!
  • Play Queen of Pain minimap icon.png r Her sister is Queen of Pine, and works for a large, Swedish furniture retailer.
  • Play Queen of Pain minimap icon.png r So hot. And so scary.
  • Play Razor minimap icon.png r Oh he's an electric razor. I finally get it!
  • Play Riki minimap icon.png r Hardest hero to draw, bar none.
  • Play Rubick minimap icon.png r Multiply that by a Rubick.
  • Play Sand King minimap icon.png r Harnesses the awesome power of s-sand.
  • Play Clinkz minimap icon.png r He's a bloody skeleton!
  • Play Skeleton King minimap icon.png u He's got a bone motorcycle, he plays the trom-bone, he's got a bone phone, he's got it all!
  • Play Slardar minimap icon.png r Something smells a bit mm-fishy.
  • Play Slardar minimap icon.png r Slarduuuuur.
  • Play Slark minimap icon.png r Aw, a detestable little man.
  • Play Slark minimap icon.png r Slarkasm is the lowest form of wit.
  • Play Slark minimap icon.png r He's Meepo's brother. Just look at him.
  • Play Sniper minimap icon.png r Sniper is awesome. At kill-stealing.
  • Play Spirit Breaker minimap icon.png r Mmmmmove over!
  • Play Storm Spirit minimap icon.png r Storm Spirit! Ha ha ha!
  • Play Sven minimap icon.png r How can Sven inspire his allies when he's just like *mumbling sounds*?
  • Play Templar Assassin minimap icon.png r What kind of temple has an assassin?
  • Play Tiny minimap icon.png r Rock beats scissors!
  • Play Tiny minimap icon.png r He's a living misnomer!
  • Play Undying minimap icon.png r Undying!
  • Play Undying minimap icon.png r Who died and made you king of the zombies?
  • Play Ursa minimap icon.png r He's a bear!
  • Play Ursa minimap icon.png r Ursa is responsible for a lot of pants-soiling in my house.
  • Play Venomancer minimap icon.png r He doesn't need wards. He poops wards.
  • Play Venomancer minimap icon.png r Is it ve-no, or vee-no?
  • Play Viper minimap icon.png r See now this guy's easy. It's just q q q q q.
  • Play Visage minimap icon.png r Visaaaage. Sounds like an 80s band.
  • Play Warlock minimap icon.png r Great. Now we're all going to die.
  • Play Io minimap icon.png r Wisp looks like an alien that would totally kill a red shirt in an episode of Star Trek and be like my people do not comprehend death woooooo!

25% chance

  • Play Kunkka minimap icon.pngLone Druid minimap icon.pngAnti-Mage minimap icon.pngDeath Prophet minimap icon.pngEmber Spirit minimap icon.pngInvoker minimap icon.pngLion minimap icon.pngEnigma minimap icon.pngRubick minimap icon.png r Ah! Popped collar! Pro player alarm sounded!
  • Play Axe minimap icon.pngBeastmaster minimap icon.pngCentaur Warrunner minimap icon.pngKunkka minimap icon.pngSpirit Breaker minimap icon.pngAnti-Mage minimap icon.pngElder Titan minimap icon.pngMagnus minimap icon.pngPudge minimap icon.png r Yes! More beef! More beef!
  • Play Alchemist minimap icon.pngAxe minimap icon.pngBeastmaster minimap icon.pngCentaur Warrunner minimap icon.pngDark Seer minimap icon.pngDisruptor minimap icon.pngEarthshaker minimap icon.pngNature's Prophet minimap icon.pngKeeper of the Light minimap icon.pngKunkka minimap icon.pngLeshrac minimap icon.pngLone Druid minimap icon.pngNecrophos minimap icon.pngOmniknight minimap icon.pngSniper minimap icon.pngSpirit Breaker minimap icon.pngStorm Spirit minimap icon.pngTinker minimap icon.pngTiny minimap icon.pngTreant Protector minimap icon.pngTusk minimap icon.png r Hmm hm! Bearded!
  • Play Alchemist minimap icon.pngAxe minimap icon.pngBeastmaster minimap icon.pngCentaur Warrunner minimap icon.pngDark Seer minimap icon.pngDisruptor minimap icon.pngEarthshaker minimap icon.pngNature's Prophet minimap icon.pngKeeper of the Light minimap icon.pngKunkka minimap icon.pngLeshrac minimap icon.pngLone Druid minimap icon.pngNecrophos minimap icon.pngOmniknight minimap icon.pngSniper minimap icon.pngSpirit Breaker minimap icon.pngStorm Spirit minimap icon.pngTinker minimap icon.pngTiny minimap icon.pngTreant Protector minimap icon.pngTusk minimap icon.png r Ah! Nice beard!

15% chance

  • Play Weaver minimap icon.png r You Sneaky, unpleasant son of a bitch.

Beginning battle

Entering battle

  • Play Prepare for battle!
  • Play Prepare for battle.
  • Play Prepare for battle!
  • Play Prepare for battle!
  • Play Oh my god it's almost time!

Time before battle
30 seconds

  • Play Just enough time to make a cup of tea.
  • Play Thirty seconds!

10 seconds

  • Play Why does it have to count down like this? I'm nervous enough as it is!
  • Play Ten seconds to battle.

Battle begins

Kills

First Blood

  • Play Rambo style. First blood!
  • Play If you want a war you've got. First blood!
  • Play First blood! followup

Spectator only

  • Play First blood! And I didn't miss it!

Double Kill

  • Play That's a twofer!

15% chance, player only

  • Play r You've got a double-kill! (harmonica)

1% chance, player only

  • Play r (While playing xylophone) They will sing a song about how awesome you were today because you have given them a thrill, because you've got a double kill!

Triple Kill

Ultra Kill

  • Play Oh boosh booshidie boosh-boosh!

Rampage

  • Play By the legend of Hall and Oates, did you see that? followup

Killing Spree

Dominating

  • Play Bibble bibble bibble.
  • Play Bibble bibble bibble.

15% chance, player only

  • Play You just got drafted by Pwn State!

Mega Kill

15% chance, player only

  • Play You just killed a boy band's worth of enemies.

Unstoppable

  • Play Oh the humanity!

Wicked Sick

Monster Kill

  • Play Prophecy is true. He is the chosen one!

Godlike

Holy Shit

  • Play My god. It's full of stars!

Ownage

20% chance

15% chance

  • Play r The square root of the own zone!

Non-streak related
5% chance, any player death

  • Play r Boosh!
  • Play r Boosh!
  • Play r Boosh!
  • Play r Boosh!
  • Play r Boosh!
  • Play r Skadoosh!
  • Play u Boosh! Boosh! Boosh!
  • Play u Oh boosh booshidie boosh-boosh!
  • Play Morphling minimap icon.png r Aqua-boosh!
  • Play Morphling minimap icon.png r We gotta take steps.
  • Play u You're an anchor for this team!

Team Wipe
Your team
15% chance

  • Play r Number one on Fails of the Week, guaranteed!
  • Play r Toughen up!
  • Play r Toughen up!
  • Play r Why? Why? Why? Why? Why? Why?
  • Play r What the hell is going on?

5% chance

  • Play r Well done man! Now we can all respawn together and hold hands and sing songs around the freaking campfire about what an idiot you are.

Enemy team
50% chance

  • Play r Oh man that teamfight had more booshes than a boosh salad!
  • Play r Booshes galore!
  • Play r Does anybody else need a new pair of underpants.
  • Play r That play just made it into the Grand Pantheon of Dota 2 plays. But it is a very, very big pantheon.
  • Play r What are we playing for here?
  • Play r Bibble bibble bibble.
  • Play r We got this man. We got this by the ass.
  • Play r This is one of those games I wish was in slow-mo because my brain just melted.
  • Play r Okay, someone explain what happened because I have literally no idea.

Team announcements

Your Radiant Dire Enemy
Courier
killed
  • Play They killed the courier! Your courier is dead.
  • Play They killed your courier!
  • Play u They killed the courier!
  • Play Radiant's courier has been killed!
  • Play Oh Radiant's courier is dead!
  • Play Radiant's courier is dead!
  • Play Dire's courier has been killed!
  • Play Dire's courier is dead.
Roshan
killed
  • Play Roshan has fallen to the Radiant. followup
  • Play Rosh is just a chill dude, so someone explain to me why Radiant had to go and kill him?
  • Play Radiant killed Roshan! What's radiant about that?
  • Play Roshan has fallen to the Dire! followup
  • Play Hey uh someone check Rosh. Maybe they're doing Rosh. Wait, Dire did Rosh.
Structure
under attack

Top tower

25% chance

  • Play 30 Uh excuse me sir, but it's your top tower. It says it's being destroyed.

1% chance

  • Play r That top tower of yours ain lookin--no, wait, sorry, no, wrong announcer pack.

Middle tower

25% chance

  • Play 30 Ah, pardon the interruption sir but it's phonecall from your middle tower. It says it's being destroyed.

Bottom tower

Top barracks

Middle barracks

  • Play 10 Your middle barracks are under attack. followup
  • Play 10 Oh lord. Not the middle barracks! Not old middly!

Bottom barracks

  • Play 10 Your bottom barracks are under attack. followup
  • Play 10 Mind out chaps. Bottom barracks is getting piddled on.
  • Play 10 Cor blimey gov. Not me bottom rax!

The Ancient

Top tower

  • Play 10 Radiant's top tower is under attack! followup
  • Play 30 Green dude's top thing is about to get knocked over.

Middle tower

Bottom tower

  • Play 20 You green dudes: something bad is happening. In your bottom.

Top barracks

  • Play 10 Radiant's top barracks are under attack.

10% chance

  • Play r Good guys top rax is going to be covered in winner's poop soon enough.

Middle barracks

  • Play 10 Radiant's middle barracks are under attack.
  • Play u Middle rax. That's gg bro. G bloody G.

Bottom barracks

  • Play 10 Radiant's bottom barracks are under attack.

10% chance

  • Play r Bottom rax gonna give it to ya! Not anymore. It's being pooped on.

The Ancient

  • Play 10 Radiant's ancient is under attack! followup
  • Play 10 Radiant's ancient is getting killed!

Top tower

  • Play 30 Bad dude's top tower gonna fall over soon!
  • Play 10 Dire's top tower is under attack. followup

Middle tower

  • Play 30 Bad dudes. Middle tower! Everyone go! Now!
  • Play 10 Dire's middle tower is under attack. followup

Bottom tower

Top barracks

  • Play 10 Dire's top barracks are under attack.
  • Play 10 Bad dude's top rax is getting minced!

Middle barracks

  • Play 10 Dire's middle barracks are under attack.
  • Play 10 Going from bad to worse. Now the bad dudes' middle rax is getting shafted.

Bottom barracks

  • Play 10 Dire's bottom barracks are under attack.

The Ancient

  • Play 10 Dire's ancient is under attack! followup
  • Play 10 Dire's ancient needs rescuing!
  • Play 10 The evil dudes' base is getting owned.
Structure
fallen

Top tower

  • Play 10 Your top tower has fallen. followup
  • Play 10 Remember that top tower you liked so much? Mmwa! Kiss it goodbye!

Middle tower

  • Play 10 Your middle tower has fallen. followup
  • Play 10 Middle tower. Take it off your Christmas card list. It's gone!

Bottom tower

Top barracks

Middle barracks

  • Play 10 Your middle barracks has fallen. followup
  • Play 10 Uh hello? We needed that middle rax.

Bottom barracks

  • Play 10 Your bottom barracks has fallen. followup
  • Play 10 Pff. Bottom rax. Who needs it?

Top tower

  • Play 10 Radiant's top tower has fallen.
  • Play 10 Green dude's tower got owned, son!

Middle tower

  • Play 10 Radiant's middle tower has fallen.
  • Play 10 Uh yo good guys. Middle tower got owned. What'cha gonna do? Get mad, or get even?

Bottom tower

  • Play 10 Radiant's bottom tower has fallen.
  • Play 10 Good dude's bottom just fell off.

Top barracks

  • Play 10 Radiant's top barracks has fallen.

10% chance

  • Play r Ah this just in, can now confirm: poop now all over good guy's top rax.

Middle barracks

  • Play 10 Radiant's middle barracks has fallen.
  • Play 10 Okay that really is gg. Good guy's middle rax is in pieces.

Bottom barracks

  • Play 10 Radiant's bottom barracks has fallen.
  • Play 10 Bottom rax gone. Turns out Radiant did need it.

Top tower

  • Play 10 Dire's top tower has fallen.
  • Play 10 Bad dude's top is all nasty and broke-y!

Middle tower

  • Play 10 Dire's middle tower has fallen.
  • Play 10 Ruh roh! Bad dudes. Ruh roh! Middly-widdly gone all diddly!

Bottom tower

  • Play 10 That bottom tower you bad dudes had was crap anyway. Don’t sweat it.
  • Play 10 Dire's bottom tower has fallen.

Top barracks

  • Play 10 Dire's top barracks has fallen.
  • Play 10 Bad dude's rax is now officially burger meat.

Middle barracks

  • Play 10 Dire's middle barracks has fallen.
  • Play 10 Ey bad dudes. Your middle rax is like uh chopped liver. Fuggeddaboutit.

Bottom barracks

  • Play 10 Dire's bottom barracks has fallen.

Top tower

  • Play 10 The enemy's top tower has fallen. followup
  • Play 10 Hell yeah! Their top tower got boned.

Middle tower

Bottom tower

  • Play 10 The enemy's bottom tower has fallen! followup
  • Play 10 Those sods. We got their bottom tower. Rock on, Tommy!

Top barracks

  • Play 10 The enemy's top barracks has fallen.
  • Play 10 Oh flippin' nora we got their top rax!

Middle barracks

Bottom barracks

  • Play 10 The enemy's bottom barracks has fallen. followup
  • Play 10 Their bottom rax has been fired into the sun with a giant catapult.
Structure
denied

Top tower

  • Play 10 Your top tower has been denied. followup
  • Play 10 I think it's shift and A to deny things. Pretty sure. Top tower denied anyway.

Middle tower

  • Play 10 Your middle tower has been denied. followup
  • Play 10 How did you do that? You denied that tower man! That was so pro!

Bottom tower

  • Play 10 Your bottom tower has been denied. followup
  • Play 10 Wow. Denied. I'm surprised.

Top tower

  • Play 10 Radiant's top tower has been denied.
  • Play 10 Good guy's top tower is denied. Whop-e-do!

Middle tower

  • Play 10 Radiant's middle tower has been denied.
  • Play 10 Good guys middle tower got denied. Somebody did that. That's such a pro move.

Bottom tower

  • Play 10 Radiant's bottom tower has been denied.
  • Play 10 Good guys bottom tower has been denied. Good luck upgrading the donkey now.

Top tower

  • Play 10 Dire's top tower has been denied.
  • Play 10 Bad dudes did something really evil, and owned their own top tower!

Middle tower

  • Play 10 Dire's middle tower has been denied.

Bottom tower

  • Play 10 Bottom tower denied for those evil bastards. Oh they make me so mad. Mmm!

Top tower

  • Play 10 The enemy's top tower has been denied. followup
  • Play 10 Their top tower fell over. Oh wait, they did it.

Middle tower

  • Play 10 The enemy's middle tower has been denied. followup
  • Play 10 Oh man, middle tower denied. How can I afford wards now?

Bottom tower

  • Play 10 The enemy's bottom tower has been denied. followup
  • Play 10 They denied their bottom tower. Can we still be friends.
Structures
fortified
Megacreeps
  • Play Megecreeps. Aw! Those guys are awesome!
  • Play We now have megacreeps. followup
  • Play We have megacreeps. We win!
  • Play u You now have megacreeps.
  • Play The Radiant now have megacreeps.
  • Play Good guys gonna win. Megacreeps riding to the rescue.
  • Play The Dire now have megacreeps.
  • Play Bad guy have megacreeps. Bad guy have megacreeps. Bad guys have megacreeps all up in your grill.
  • Play They have megacreeps. Just go hide in the fountain. It's cool, everybodydoes it.
  • Play The megacreeps will kill you. Megacreeps will kill you. Megacreeps will kill you.
  • Play The enemy now has megacreeps. followup
Victory

15% chance, Radiant team

  • Play Oh Radiant won! I could kiss you!

15% chance, Dire team

  • Play Well done Dire. I will personally shake all of your hands.
  • Play Good guys win! How tremendous!
  • Play Radiant victory! followup
  • Play Victoire! Victoire! Vive le Radiant!

15% chance

  • Play Whoa. The good guys won. That literally never happens.
  • Play The Dire dudes won and now that's it, everything is over.
  • Play Dire victory! followup

15% chance, Radiant team

  • Play Oh goody goody gumdrops. The land of faeries and little kittens won. Vomit.

15% chance, Dire team

  • Play Are you happy now, bad dudes? Huh? Oh you, you are? Okay, good! Good for you!

Respawning

5% chance

  • Play r If you do that again, your teammates are going to shout at you, and you will cry.
  • Play r Why aren't you getting this?
  • Play r Uh, being bad is a choice.
  • Play r Stop being aggressively terrible.
  • Play Batrider minimap icon.png r Man this Batrider is awesome. He hasn't touched the ground once since the match started!
  • Play Axe minimap icon.png r Axe goes to base to respawn.
  • Play Axe minimap icon.png r Good day sir!
  • Play Doom minimap icon.png r You should steal the power of not sucking.
  • Play Pudge minimap icon.png r Pudge, let's not sugarcoat it, this man is a food singularity!
  • Play Spirit Breaker minimap icon.png r Spirit Breaker is not amoooosed.

Lane missing

  • Play u Your top is missing.
  • Play u Missing top!
  • Play u Missing top!
  • Play u Missing middle!
  • Play u Middle is missing!
  • Play u Missing middle!
  • Play u Your bottom is missing.
  • Play u Your bottom is missing.
  • Play u Where's your bottom? It's missing!

Periods with no action

15% chance, any time

  • Play u I may need to alt+tab from time to time to find out how this all works.
  • Play r It could go one way, or the other, which is to say: I have no idea what the hell is going on.
  • Play r How's the weather there? Eh? Raining here. Yeah. Rubbish isn't it. Oh well.
  • Play r Let me just set my alarm here. Wake me up when people start playing Dota.

15% chance, mid game and onward

  • Play r Ah to be young again.
  • Play r I wish to God I could be even one-tenth as good as these guys.
  • Play r Somebody take over please. I need to make a cup of tea.
  • Play r Once upon a time, there was a game of Dota 2. And nothing happened at all.
  • Play r Congratulations. You're the one-millionth Dota 2 player to make me fall asleep.
  • Play r (whistling)
  • Play r (whistling)
  • Play r This game is like a donut filled with lava and diamonds. Boiling hot diamonds!
  • Play r Thanks for inviting me to commentate on the most boring game ever!
  • Play r Mrs. Flax just asked me if I ever intend to spend time with my family again. Answer is no.
  • Play r Stick the bloody kettle on, would you?

Purchasing specific items

25% chance

  • Play Armlet of Mordiggian (2380) r You got the omlette!
  • Play Armlet of Mordiggian (2380) r You got the omlette!
  • Play Armlet of Mordiggian (2380) r Armlet of Mordigigigigian!
  • Play Armlet of Mordiggian (2380) r Armlet of Mordigigiagugun!
  • Play Armlet of Mordiggian (2380) r Armlet of Mordigiagan.
  • Play Aghanim's Scepter (4200) r Aghanim's skepter.
  • Play Aghanim's Scepter (4200) r Aghanim's scepter. There's almost certainly something else you should've bought.
  • Play Skull Basher (2950) r Bash some skulls!
  • Play Battle Fury (4400) r Battlefury.
  • Play Black King Bar (4050) r Black king bar.
  • Play Black King Bar (4050) r Ah black king bar!
  • Play Blade Mail (2200) r Blade mail.
  • Play Blink Dagger (2250) r Blinku dagger!
  • Play Blink Dagger (2250) r Blink dagger.
  • Play Blink Dagger (2250) r Noice blink dagger.
  • Play Bloodstone (4900) r Bloodstooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooone.
  • Play Butterfly (5475) r Has to be the most terrifying butterfly ever.
  • Play Daedalus (5330) r Daedaladlus. Daeladelus.
  • Play Dagon (2700) r Dagon'it!
  • Play Dagon (2700) r Dagoon!
  • Play Dagon (2700) r Dagon.
  • Play Divine Rapier (6000) r Divine Rapier. Lord have mercy.
  • Play Divine Rapier (6000) r Rapier throw incoming!
  • Play Drum of Endurance (1525) r Drum of endurance. Now with electrolytes!
  • Play Eaglesong (3200) r Eaglesong!
  • Play Ethereal Blade (4700) r Ethereal blade!
  • Play Ethereal Blade (4700) r E-blade!
  • Play Eul's Scepter of Divinity (2750) r Eul's scepter of spinerocity.
  • Play Force Staff (2250) r Nobody's forcing you. Heh heh heh.
  • Play Heart of Tarrasque (5200) r Heart of Terrasque.
  • Play Heaven's Halberd (3500) r Heaven's Halberd!
  • Play Helm of the Dominator (1875) r Helm of the Demominiminator.
  • Play Helm of the Dominator (1875) r Helm of the lowest common denominator.
  • Play Hood of Defiance (1700) r Hoodie of defiance.
  • Play Gem of True Sight (900) r Take that, you invisible swine!
  • Play Manta Style (4700) r Mm manta style.
  • Play Manta Style (4700) r Your manta style is strong. But it is no match for my dragon style.
  • Play Mjollnir (5600) r Mjollininer.
  • Play Mjollnir (5600) r Mjoeoew.
  • Play Mjollnir (5600) r Mjeoneer.
  • Play Monkey King Bar (4175) r A monkey walks into a bar and, and the bartender says Why the long face? um…
  • Play Mask of Madness (1775) r Mask of madness!
  • Play Mask of Madness (1775) r If you buy Mask of Madness, you are literally mad.
  • Play Mystic Staff (2700) r Ah! A mystic staff!
  • Play Necronomicon (2400) r Necronominina.
  • Play Necronomicon (2400) r Necrominomina. Necrominun. Necuclun. Necbook!
  • Play Orchid Malevolence (4075) r Orchid Malevolelence!
  • Play Perseverance (1700) r Peseverrence.
  • Play Pipe of Insight (3025) r Pipe! Of. Insight.
  • Play Poor Man's Shield (500) r Poor Man's Shield? This thing costs a fortune!
  • Play Poor Man's Shield (500) r Poor Man's Shield? Boy when I was young we couldn't afford any kind of shield. Had to make do with friend's face!
  • Play Poor Man's Shield (500) r When I was young, we couldn't afford a shield. Had to make do with a friend's face.
  • Play Shadow Blade (2800) r Pub blade.
  • Play Radiance (5150) r Radiance!
  • Play Refresher Orb (5100) r These do not stack.
  • Play Rod of Atos (2750) r Rod of Atos. No healthcare for you.
  • Play Sange and Yasha (4100) r Sandwich and usual.
  • Play Sange and Yasha (4100) r Sandwich and pasta.
  • Play Eye of Skadi (5500) r Eye of Skadi.
  • Play Power Treads (1380) r Power shoes.
  • Play Power Treads (1380) r Shame you can't switch treads to 'do not suck'.
  • Play Power Treads (1380) r Mega shoes.
  • Play Vanguard (2150) r Vangward.
  • Play Vanguard (2150) r Vongward.
  • Play Veil of Discord (2050) r Veil of Discord, or as I call it: Christmas at my mother in law's! Ba-dombo-tsh!

20% chance

  • Play Assault Cuirass (5250) r Assault Crrrs.
  • Play Assault Cuirass (5250)Chainmail (550)Shiva's Guard (4750)Platemail (1400) r If in doubt, slap armour on it.

15% chance

  • Play Arcane Boots (1400) r Mana boots! Hell yeah!
  • Play Arcane Boots (1400) r Arcane boots. Now you can continue to waste mana in inefficient ways!
  • Play Bottle (650) r Here friend. Have a sip from my bottle.
  • Play Clarity (50) r A potion of clarity.
  • Play Clarity (50) r Clarity potion. I could seriously use a few of these right now.
  • Play Animal Courier (50) r What the hell is that thing?
  • Play Animal Courier (50) r Good luck little guy. You're gonna need it.
  • Play Animal Courier (50) r No mere donkey, this.
  • Play Flying Courier (150) r Could someone please upgrade the courier-oh! Thank you.
  • Play Flying Courier (150) r Congrats! Your courier can now fly to its death instead of just walk there.
  • Play Gauntlets of Strength (135) r Pff, heavy hands.
  • Play Mekansm (2275) r Mekansm. Ugh. I hate having to buy this boring, boring item.
  • Play Quelling Blade (200) r Quelling blade!
  • Play Quelling Blade (200) r Queue-ling blade!
  • Play Tango (90) r Now you can eat trees. So useful!
  • Play Tango (90) r Tangos. Mm, delicious.
  • Play Tango (90) r Tangos. Use them wisely.
  • Play Tango (90) r Delicious tangos.

10% chance

  • Play Smoke of Deceit (80) r Smoke gank incoming!
  • Play Smoke of Deceit (80)Dust of Appearance (180)Sentry Ward (100) r Tryhards.
  • Play Smoke of Deceit (80)Dust of Appearance (180)Sentry Ward (100) r You know what you're doing!
  • Play Observer Ward (75) r Only me and Lich get excited about wards. I know that's pathetic.
  • Play Observer Ward (75) r I love wards almost as much as Lich does.
  • Play Observer Ward (75) r Wards. Now you have no excuse for getting ganked.
  • Play Band of Elvenskin (450) r Band of Elvenskin? Literally? That's barbaric!
  • Play Dust of Appearance (180) r Dusty springfield!
  • Play Dust of Appearance (180)Sentry Ward (100) r Invisible swine!
  • Play Dust of Appearance (180)Sentry Ward (100) r Take that, you invisible swine!
  • Play Linken's Sphere (5050) r Linken's what?
  • Play Magic Stick (200) r Magic stick!
  • Play Magic Stick (200) r Uh if you like that magic stick, I have some magic beans for you.
  • Play Magic Stick (200) r Here, this stick is magic, I promise.
  • Play Slippers of Agility (135) r Slippers of Agility? Have you ever tried running in slippers?

5% chance

  • Play Healing Salve (110) r This salve cannot heal a broken heart.
  • Play Iron Branch (50) r Iron branches. Far, far more useful than they sound.
  • Play Town Portal Scroll (50) r There is no town. Just more bloody towers.

1% chance

  • Play Flying Courier (150) r About bloody time.

Unclassified

  • Play u What do we do with a drunken P-Flax early in the morning.
  • Play u Why isn't this courier upgraded you legendarily worthless bastard?!

Followups

Welcome
All Pick

25% chance

  • Play r All pick, thank God.

Least Played

  • Play r Least played!

25% chance

  • Play r Least played mode.
  • Play r Least played mode.

Limited Heroes

  • Play r Pick your hero!

Mid Only

Draft end

  • Play Pick your hero!
  • Play You may now select your hero.

Battle begins
50% chance

  • Play The eternal struggle betwixt creep and creep lumbers on.
  • Play Go on creeps! Hit those other creeps!
  • Play Boom! Welcome to Pyrion Flax's guide to being a Dota 2 announcer.

50% chance, when team consists of 5 carries

  • Play This team is the manliest team imaginable!

15% chance

  • Play Into the valley of death rode the five idiots.

First Blood
25% chance

  • Play I don't know if you're hacking or my game is bugged or something but seriously.
  • Play My three-year-old can do this.

Triple Kill, Rampage & Killing Spree
15% chance

  • Play r Now where did I put my grave-dancing shoes?

Godlike

  • Play r Before he knew it, nine men lay dead at his feet. Nine!
  • Play r Roll around in their insides. DO IT!

Structures fortified
10% chance, when enemy fortified

  • Play r Their tower's doing that woooo thing. Fortified!

Roshan killed
5% chance, when own team killed

  • Play r The Aegis-slash-Aajis-slash-Eejis of the immortal!

25% chance, third death and onward

  • Play r So l-let me get this straight: you walk into a man's house, you kill him, and you take his cheese. What's wrong with you?
  • Play r Congratulations on making a really sad story even sadder.
  • Play r He has cheese in his pockets?
  • Play r Cheese!
  • Play r Pure cheese.

1% chance, third death and onward

  • Play r Now I have an aegis. Ho ho ho.

Victory

  • Play u Congratulations. Here's the end screen.

50% chance, for winning team

  • Play Wow! Oh! I mean I--I didn't see that coming!
  • Play If it wasn't for my guides, this would not have been possible.
  • Play I'm glad we won.
  • Play (Incoherent cheering)
  • Play (Incoherent cheering)
  • Play Yay! We won! MVP goes to the guy with the longest name.
  • Play Woo hoo! We won! MVP goes to whoever died the most. Well done!

15% chance, for losing team

  • Play You lost. It was totally my fault. I'm really sorry.

Positive
30% chance

  • Play r If it was me, I'd need a new pair of pants.
  • Play r Are you serious?
  • Play r Are you serious?
  • Play r Hmm hm hm ho ho ho ha ha!
  • Play r Ha ha ha ha ha gold!
  • Play r Die große Mannen auf dem Campus.
  • Play r Noice!
  • Play r This is really remarkable Steve.
  • Play r Take that you bounders!

1% chance, enemy tower destroyed, players only

  • Play r Easy game, easy tower, easy life!
  • Play r Get that tower! Yes!

Negative
30% chance

  • Play r Wow, you make me look good. Thanks!
  • Play r A wizard should know better.
  • Play r Booo!
  • Play r Bro do you even lift?
  • Play r Bro do you even lift?
  • Play r If you're feeling faint that's okay. Just lie down, elevate the legs, and breathe into this paper bag.
  • Play r There is no ointment, cream, nor poultice to heal these wounds.
  • Play r Who did that? Who did that?

5% chance

  • Play r Is there any way back from this? No.
  • Play r Towers are being bulldozed, but for what? This is all meaningless!

1% chance, Dire tower destroyed, spectators only

  • Play r Bad dudes. Why didn't you buy TP scrolls? Seriously. Even I do that.

Negative ongoing
20% chance

  • Play r Ding dong!
  • Play r Can we pause please? I'm terrified beyond the capacity for rational thought.
  • Play r Why is this so bloody difficult?
  • Play r We're detecting high levels of suckocity, captain.
  • Play r Ey yous guys doin' some great work fuggedaboutit.
  • Play r Ey fuggedaboutit.
  • Play r Oh man this is totally harshing my mellow.
  • Play r Guy guys guys. You need to defend here.